All moments led up to this
I was bruised and battered
My love had been torn apart
I was broken and resurgent
Tried over and over again
I pretended it didnt hurt
But inside it felt like
Even God didnt care
But I learned he cares
Because of you.
The day we met, in person
I honestly thought you were
Just like everybody else
A little cuter and more sunny
Sparkly even with that loud voice
All your stories and the cutest smile
But it was easy to just not buy in
And there were excuses, easy to find and ripe for the picking, telling me even if I wanted it, we would never work out
So I said yes to someone else
And that meant going through my list
Getting rid of old beaus one by one
Clearing the way for this next
Short-lived commitment
It was a relief to have them gone
Dating was really just a chore
Til I came to your name
And the little twinge in my stomach
As I said goodbye to such a sweet face
And months of potential
But I knew it couldn't work
So I sent the text and shut that door
Still, as I turned my back and waited for silence, there was no slam
You put your foot in the door
With one text
You looked me in the eyes
And said you're worth it
And I want you
And I'm going to fight for you
Maybe it was the timing
Or remembering that twinge
Or just the surprise that someone
Wonderful and alive
Thought I was wonderful too
It made it easy and okay to want you
I wanted to be alive with you
I wanted to have that sun and sparkly laugh and loud stories and handsome brown face in my life for a long time
My life was becoming gray until I met you
And maybe that isn't love
Maybe I just want you so badly
It's unfair and unhealthy
But even if we have nothing else
And everything is a struggle
If we fight and forget and argue
I'll never stop wanting you
You know how to love me
And maybe its selfish that's the reason I want you so bad
But I hope that means I know how to love you too
I try to explain to people what it is
I list the qualities and accomplishments
Things I'm so proud of you for
But that doesnt touch it
Or illuminate the ocean of why I love you
You wanted me, you valued me, you told me I was good and enough and that you felt lucky. You opened your life to me. You shared everything, your food, your friends, your home. You didnt think twice and you made me your own.
And when I didnt trust and was so afraid to fall and get hurt I made a mistake that hurt you even worse. You turned cold for a day, no doubt questioning everything you couldn't see. But you forgave and realized we could both start to give freely.
Our relationship grew from there and it surpassed new heights. We've taken risks and taken steps, we've grown and played and progressed. We have plans and a future. Mostly we're comfortable. A deep seated, stable zen. And finally feeling that everything is right.
We are the same flesh, the same spirit and without you I'm not whole anymore. I found my missing half in you. And there's no other way to describe it than that. I love you more than just superficial attraction and charm. I love you more than inherent need or temporary loneliness. I love you more than the desire to have someone to whom I can give all I am. You are my husband. And when we get married, all the world will see that.
